So last night while almost half the women in my country were hungry and thirsty for the long lives of their beloved husbands, I was sitting at my usual 7 pm and relishing some awesome pizza (maid was fasting and on leave) and the husband had to tell me that if not fast at least don’t overeat 😂. So this was second time consecutively that I did not fast… last year being pregnant and this year since I am feeding my little one.
Perhaps as a young girl I found Karvachauth the most romantic festival… the girl goes hungry for the guy she loves while the guy reciprocates and pamper the girl…. this was how it was pictured in those yash chopra and later karan johar movies.
No I am not religious… i am just a spiritual person… I follow customs cause I like customs and not because I fear god. God is to be loved and not feared. So I started fasting as a young girl… just because i liked the idea of it..
And then post marriage there is so much more glamour to it. The first karvachauth was away from each other so was perhaps like before just that I had my mom in law with me. The second one was together and I was aghast since no reciprocating but yes the pampering compensated. So third and fourth I kept trying to tell him that it would be nice if he reciprocates and hence he gave me a new theory. .. if I too fast than where is the greatness of your fast and even though he shook the foundation of my romantic idea I was more than convinced….
Anyhow slowly the whole romantic idea started fading… age I guess. And then so did the glamour of dressing up… that too hungry and thirsty. So my pooja started happening in pajamas with just a pretty dupatta on top.
My mom in law is a very cool person and does not follow customs blindly. She never asked anything or insisted. In fact this whole redefining of karvachauth happened while I was having a conversation with her.
So I realise that perhaps what would make him healthy and happy is less stress and more happiness. Like I was telling my mom in law… perhaps a days maun vrat (pledge to remain quiet) would make his life longer than me going hungry and thirsty. Of course I am not sure I can go mute for very long but perhaps I can pledge to be good and rather than seek pampering… pamper him. Make the day special for him. Celebrate the festival… dress up.. pooja… mehndi etc and a feast at home that he enjoys. And a day filled with love and a promise to love unconditionally.
Perhaps a fruit fast in name of custom and detoxify my body but yes feast for him 🙂 with the changing times perhaps customs too need to be slightly changed….